Wife inherited $1 million from estranged malignant narcissist mom. Pay off mortgage?

mtm105

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invested right, live off what you make at your job. ( 1 mill in the bank you still have a job right)
buy your goods right, a mill would make a great nest egg.
We are planning on spending 1/2. Invest the rest. I figure mortgage has to go, considering one pays twice the price of a home with interest.

She is waiting on her step-mom to croak allowing her to get a trust fund. I’m retired, almost six-figures from gubberment. I’m no privileged genius. 5 years ago I was right seat ride on a UPS truck despondent over bills.

I’m into boutique amps. I don’t own khakis.
 

Vinsanitizer

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We are planning on spending 1/2. Invest the rest. I figure mortgage has to go, considering one pays twice the price of a home with interest.

She is waiting on her step-mom to croak allowing her to get a trust fund. I’m retired, almost six-figures from gubberment.

I’m into boutique amps. I don’t own khakis.
:facepalm: Please forgive us (me) - what was the original question again?
 

ricksdisconnected

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We are planning on spending 1/2. Invest the rest. I figure mortgage has to go, considering one pays twice the price of a home with interest.

She is waiting on her step-mom to croak allowing her to get a trust fund. I’m retired, almost six-figures from gubberment. I’m no genius. 5 years ago I was right seat ride on a UPS truck despondent over bills.

I’m into boutique amps. I don’t own khakis.
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crossroadsnyc

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Why get a lawyer? It’s the wife’s money. A lawyer cannot change that and will likely just destroy what’s left of the marriage. Work it out with your wife. If you can’t it’s decision time as to the future of the marriage. But unless or until she comingles inheritance funds with joint funds you have no claim to any of it. At least based on the limitation of the facts in the post.

This.

Based on what was written in the OP, there is no reason to obtain legal counsel. Unless the money is commingled, an inheritance is not considered a marital asset to be shared/split. As long as she keeps it separate, OP will have no claim to it. Though, I‘m not exactly sure of what’s in OP’s head, so this might not be what he’s interested in discussing anyway.
 

Vinsanitizer

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This.

Based on what was written in the OP, there is no reason to obtain legal counsel. Unless the money is commingled, an inheritance is not considered a marital asset to be shared/split. As long as she keeps it separate, OP will have no claim to it. Though, I‘m not exactly sure of what’s in OP’s head, so this might not be what he’s interested in discussing anyway.
Ok, good. You fix it, I'm going over to the Guitars forum for a while. :D
 
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mtm105

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This.

Based on what was written in the OP, there is no reason to obtain legal counsel. Unless the money is commingled, an inheritance is not considered a marital asset to be shared/split. As long as she keeps it separate, OP will have no claim to it. Though, I‘m not exactly sure of what’s in OP’s head, so this might not be what he’s interested in discussing anyway.
Originally we agreed I was to be the executor. A letter of Admin came through with her name on it, and she could smell the $$ and derailed me from my duties after I went through all of the footwork. Legally I get 3% minimum. That’s $30K. She now gives me peanuts expecting me to be gracious. I put my foot down. $30K startup. If not, your $ is no good with me and shove it up your selfish ass.

Now she renigs on mortgage agreement.
 

crossroadsnyc

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Originally we agreed I was to be the executor. A letter of Admin came through with her name on it, and she could smell the $$ and derailed me from my duties after I went through all of the footwork. Legally I get 3% minimum. That’s $30K. She now gives me peanuts expecting me to be gracious. I put my foot down. $30K startup. If not, your $ is no good with me and shove it up your selfish ass.

Now she renigs on mortgage agreement.

Just to note, none of this really matters unless the two of you are headed for a divorce. I don’t know the state of your marriage, so I can’t really comment on that. Just pointing out that this topic is basically meaningless unless you find yourself in court.

What you are entitled to legally also depends on commingling. I assume the 3% you referenced is compensation for being the executor of the will? If so, that could actually just be a starting point. You mentioned a few posts back that the two of you were going to spend 50% and invest 50%, right? If that’s the case, then you very well may be entitled to half should you divorce and have to split assets. FWIW, while I’m nearly certain she is being counseled on the legalities of all of this (which could very well be why she balks at paying off the mortgage) it’s probably best for you to keep your mouth shut and play dumb.

If I’m reading between the lines, then I still maintain that you do not yet need an attorney … but it also might not be a bad idea to start laying the groundwork with some early planning/thinking ahead. Just keep in mind that for all of the “I love you, you love me, let’s living happily ever after” stuff, marriage itself is a business arrangement. That’s the cold brutal truth.
 

mcblink

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Just keep in mind that for all of the “I love you, you love me, let’s living happily ever after” stuff, marriage itself is a business arrangement. That’s the cold brutal truth.
This. This is why I'm not married. Me and my "wife" have been together for 17 years, and plan to stay that way. We're in this together because we want to be in this together, and a piece of paper and a peice of jewelry isn't going to gain us anything that we don't already have. And, it could be detrimental to both of us (me lol) if that were to change, so why bother?

If you were going skydiving, and they told you that 3 out of 4 parachutes were going to fail, would you still jump?
 

Australian

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If you’re good at solving problems you’ll be fine.
At the end of the day in love and war boredom was the greatest shun.
 

crossroadsnyc

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This. This is why I'm not married. Me and my "wife" have been together for 17 years, and plan to stay that way. We're in this together because we want to be in this together, and a piece of paper and a peice of jewelry isn't going to gain us anything that we don't already have. And, it could be detrimental to both of us (me lol) if that were to change, so why bother?

If you were going skydiving, and they told you that 3 out of 4 parachutes were going to fail, would you still jump?

Young men need to be educated on this.
 

XTRXTR

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Well the interest on the mortgage is a tax write off, so maybe just pay the interest to help offset the tax hit you are about to get. Lawsuit settlements are tax free but only certain types of inheritances are setup to be sheltered. you need a wealth money manager and an accountant to maximize your position, tax wise and future investment returns.

Trust me its worth talking to a lawyer without her knowing about it as she may be doing the same thing. My ex was a wealth money manager and had done a couple years of lawyering and preparing before I even knew what happened. That's why I still refer to her as laying me off, I was just a cost she could get rid of. F**k that bitch. She moved money into positions that could not be counted as part our combined assets.

Inheritance money, trust me shes looking for a way out leaving you dry as possible.

Always get a lawyer.

You will be advised to your best position in case there is a divorce and she doesn't need to know you got that advice. If she doesn't go for a divorce you will be advised either way. A lawyer is always in your interest. Know your options before the hand is played.

Pay the lawyer in cash so she can't trace it. Sell something to get the money if you have to.
 

paul-e-mann

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Originally we agreed I was to be the executor. A letter of Admin came through with her name on it, and she could smell the $$ and derailed me from my duties after I went through all of the footwork. Legally I get 3% minimum. That’s $30K. She now gives me peanuts expecting me to be gracious. I put my foot down. $30K startup. If not, your $ is no good with me and shove it up your selfish ass.

Now she renigs on mortgage agreement.
You gotta smile and play nice or you get nothing, see where this is going?
 

Vinsanitizer

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This. This is why I'm not married. Me and my "wife" have been together for 17 years, and plan to stay that way. We're in this together because we want to be in this together, and a piece of paper and a peice of jewelry isn't going to gain us anything that we don't already have. And, it could be detrimental to both of us (me lol) if that were to change, so why bother?

If you were going skydiving, and they told you that 3 out of 4 parachutes were going to fail, would you still jump?
This. ^
 

RLW59

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What's the interest rate on your mortgage? If it's lower than the interest you could get on an investment, it's better to invest the money and keep paying the mortgage.

If it's a high interest mortgage, it might be better to refinance the mortgage and invest the windfall. (Depends on how high the mortgage interest is and how much refinancing would cost.)
--------------------
Most finance advisors say you shouldn't rashly do anything big with a windfall. Take your time, carefully consider the options, get professional advice.

There's some emotional security with paying off a mortgage. But you can lose 10's of thousands of dollars paying it off compared to investing the windfall.
 

jamvu

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Pay off all your unsecured debt, including high interest credit cards first. Settle any old claims on your credit to get your credit score up. You are eligible for 1 free credit report a year from the 3 majorly credit bureaus and you may see stuff on there that you didn't know about.

This will help you with future loans and get you lower interest rates.

Keep a minimum of 1 years expenses in a savings account or money market.....I would keep at least 25-30K in Biden's economy at the ready.

No need to pay off the mortgage, assuming you gave a low fixed interest rate...under 4%. If not, I would refinance now before the Fed raises interest rates in May and if you do get a 15 year loan so you can pay off the house sooner. Use some of the money for the refi and place additional money down as necessary to keep your payment the same or less.

Then buy yourself and the Mrs something nice...why not, so you don't feel jipped.

Finally, invest the rest of the money in mutual funds that track market indexes.....like the Dow, S&P, and the Russell 2000.
If you like conglomerate stock funds like I do, invest some in BRK.b....led by the great Warren Buffett.

In this way, you will have your retirement covered.

Jamvu
 

Solid State

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You gotta smile and play nice or you get nothing, see where this is going?

Pedecamp is right. Right now she's empowered and enabled by a looming payday and it's best not to prod that bull until you can see where her head is at. I'd consult a lawyer and find out of you're legally entitled to anything at all through marriage. Just going off the first post, if that last sentence is about her, good luck.
 

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