the band member venting thread

[GibsonMarshallGuy47]

I've been playing guitar in a punk/heavy rock band for a while now. its actually been an ever evolving band with many line-up changes that has taken place over the past several years. we've even made a band name change recently to reflect our most recent line-up change - about 6 months ago, our drummer (who has been less than proficient on drums, leaving much to be desired) has switched to guitar... he's a slightly better guitarist than he is a drummer, but not by much... we then replaced him with a much better drummer, who I've been extremely happy with... I should also point out that our current drummer, 2nd guitarist, and bassist also happen to be in another band on the side (in their other band, the bassist does vocals/guitar, and the other 2 guys switch up back and forth between drums, and bass/vocals).

things have been going ok so far, but that's not to say that there hasn't been things that have frustrated me over the past year or so... our bassist is a guy I've known for many years. in the realm of punk/metal, he's actually an awesome guitarist... but for some reason (and I have no idea why), regarding his bass playing skills, it seems as if his playing abilities have actually gone down a notch. you put a guitar in his hands, and he's a seasoned, chugging riff machine, but you put a bass in his hands, and its as if he just started playing like, a few years ago (he's been playing for literally DECADES)... its the weirdest thing.

and then there is the OTHER guitarist (the guy that used to be our drummer)... he's an OK guitarist. he's just about good enough to get through the songs (which, I might add, are nowhere near complicated at all). sometimes it will frustrate me because we will play a song that we've rehearsed countless times for over a year now, and because we might not have practiced it in a while (our busy schedules sometime dictate that we go a few weeks without having a band rehearsal), the other guys will tend to sound unusually sloppy, as if we just wrote the song last week.... am I missing something? is it a subconscious bout of laziness? is it just that they don't really care and aren't as emotionally invested in this band? I have no idea.

our singer is a good guy - he is sort of the organizational guy in the band when it comes to promotional stuff, band art/imagery, website stuff, booking shows, writing lyrics, plus we rehearse in his basement... if it was up to me, I would replace our bassist, and second guitarist... hell, if it was up to me, I would keep this band as a one-guitarist band. but in my opinion, those two guys are holding us back, and its really bugging me. I'm just venting here to get all this off my chest. anyone else here ever have to deal with these issues?

 

[Seven]

I've been playing guitar in a punk/heavy rock band for a while now. its actually been an ever evolving band with many line-up changes that has taken place over the past several years. we've even made a band name change recently to reflect our most recent line-up change - about 6 months ago, our drummer (who has been less than proficient on drums, leaving much to be desired) has switched to guitar... he's a slightly better guitarist than he is a drummer, but not by much... we then replaced him with a much better drummer, who I've been extremely happy with... I should also point out that our current drummer, 2nd guitarist, and bassist also happen to be in another band on the side (in their other band, the bassist does vocals/guitar, and the other 2 guys switch up back and forth between drums, and bass/vocals).

things have been going ok so far, but that's not to say that there hasn't been things that have frustrated me over the past year or so... our bassist is a guy I've known for many years. in the realm of punk/metal, he's actually an awesome guitarist... but for some reason (and I have no idea why), regarding his bass playing skills, it seems as if his playing abilities have actually gone down a notch. you put a guitar in his hands, and he's a seasoned, chugging riff machine, but you put a bass in his hands, and its as if he just started playing like, a few years ago (he's been playing for literally DECADES)... its the weirdest thing.

and then there is the OTHER guitarist (the guy that used to be our drummer)... he's an OK guitarist. he's just about good enough to get through the songs (which, I might add, are nowhere near complicated at all). sometimes it will frustrate me because we will play a song that we've rehearsed countless times for over a year now, and because we might not have practiced it in a while (our busy schedules sometime dictate that we go a few weeks without having a band rehearsal), the other guys will tend to sound unusually sloppy, as if we just wrote the song last week.... am I missing something? is it a subconscious bout of laziness? is it just that they don't really care and aren't as emotionally invested in this band? I have no idea.

our singer is a good guy - he is sort of the organizational guy in the band when it comes to promotional stuff, band art/imagery, website stuff, booking shows, writing lyrics, plus we rehearse in his basement... if it was up to me, I would replace our bassist, and second guitarist... hell, if it was up to me, I would keep this band as a one-guitarist band. but in my opinion, those two guys are holding us back, and its really bugging me. I'm just venting here to get all this off my chest. anyone else here ever have to deal with these issues?

The short answer, you're probably in the wrong band.

The best answer, there's way too much switching-up. I was trying to follow your comment but it started to feel like math or learning about relatives who I've never met.

Seriously, being in a band is hard. It's just hard and it takes hard work and dedication. Most musicians have day jobs, careers, families, significant others, etc. The band suffers and the band never becomes tight.

The stand out topic was the bass player who plays guitar well, but not so well on the bass. I play both, but I play both differently. The styles don't automatically transfer from one instrument to the other. It may be somewhat unfair to compare the two aspects of his playing. Try to see him in a different light when he plays bass. All a bass player needs to do is hold down the bottom. Personally, I don't want to hear a "lead" bass player. Just play the damn notes and add some tasty harmonies, etc.

The reality is there are only so many musicians to go around a certain area and most don't want to play live anymore, including me. Rehearsals were always fun for me and I would have been happy skipping most gigs.

Be careful what you wish for and don't forget that eventually playing with other musicians will come to an end. If not an end, then a long break in between as you chase a career, have young children, etc. Life WILL get in the way.

Enjoy your current band and provide some inspiration. It might just catch on !

 

[Crikey]

I've been playing guitar in a punk/heavy rock band for a while now. its actually been an ever evolving band with many line-up changes that has taken place over the past several years. we've even made a band name change recently to reflect our most recent line-up change - about 6 months ago, our drummer (who has been less than proficient on drums, leaving much to be desired) has switched to guitar... he's a slightly better guitarist than he is a drummer, but not by much... we then replaced him with a much better drummer, who I've been extremely happy with... I should also point out that our current drummer, 2nd guitarist, and bassist also happen to be in another band on the side (in their other band, the bassist does vocals/guitar, and the other 2 guys switch up back and forth between drums, and bass/vocals).

things have been going ok so far, but that's not to say that there hasn't been things that have frustrated me over the past year or so... our bassist is a guy I've known for many years. in the realm of punk/metal, he's actually an awesome guitarist... but for some reason (and I have no idea why), regarding his bass playing skills, it seems as if his playing abilities have actually gone down a notch. you put a guitar in his hands, and he's a seasoned, chugging riff machine, but you put a bass in his hands, and its as if he just started playing like, a few years ago (he's been playing for literally DECADES)... its the weirdest thing.

and then there is the OTHER guitarist (the guy that used to be our drummer)... he's an OK guitarist. he's just about good enough to get through the songs (which, I might add, are nowhere near complicated at all). sometimes it will frustrate me because we will play a song that we've rehearsed countless times for over a year now, and because we might not have practiced it in a while (our busy schedules sometime dictate that we go a few weeks without having a band rehearsal), the other guys will tend to sound unusually sloppy, as if we just wrote the song last week.... am I missing something? is it a subconscious bout of laziness? is it just that they don't really care and aren't as emotionally invested in this band? I have no idea.

our singer is a good guy - he is sort of the organizational guy in the band when it comes to promotional stuff, band art/imagery, website stuff, booking shows, writing lyrics, plus we rehearse in his basement... if it was up to me, I would replace our bassist, and second guitarist... hell, if it was up to me, I would keep this band as a one-guitarist band. but in my opinion, those two guys are holding us back, and its really bugging me. I'm just venting here to get all this off my chest. anyone else here ever have to deal with these issues?

Good drummers are scarce where i am. Its painful

 

[LPMarshall hack]

Bass player switches to guitar.
Old drummer switches to bass

Or

You switch to bass
Other guys play guitar

 

[GibsonMarshallGuy47]

Bass player switches to guitar.
Old drummer switches to bass

Or

You switch to bass
Other guys play guitar

ha ha!!.. well unfortunately, our bass player told us he has no desire to play guitar in another band. he prefers to stay on bass, with this band. good suggestion, though... I wish it was that easy.

 

[RCM 800]

If it becomes intolerable take the guys you want and find new talent to fill gaps then start a "new" project. If it works quit the current band.

 

[aikiguy]

IMO, It really depends on what you want out of the band life..

If you want to be the best that you can be, playing pro shows and wowing audiences everywhere, then you need to know when to move on, or possibly force others to move on.

If you want to remain friends and keep the same guys in the band, then you need to find a way to put up with the stuff that bugs you.

I’m not saying that I’m necessarily a super awesome player or anything, but if I need to recruit someone for any of the acts that I play with, they need to be up to snuff. When I get together with somebody for the first time, I normally spin it as a session where we are trying each other out… I need to be happy with them, but they need to be happy with me as well. If it doesn’t work out for whatever reason, no hard feelings.

But, like I said… It depends onwhat you want out of this. Also it depends on what they all want. Everybody needs to be aligned with their vision.

 

[GibsonMarshallGuy47]

The short answer, you're probably in the wrong band.

The best answer, there's way too much switching-up. I was trying to follow your comment but it started to feel like math or learning about relatives who I've never met.

Seriously, being in a band is hard. It's just hard and it takes hard work and dedication. Most musicians have day jobs, careers, families, significant others, etc. The band suffers and the band never becomes tight.

The stand out topic was the bass player who plays guitar well, but not so well on the bass. I play both, but I play both differently. The styles don't automatically transfer from one instrument to the other. It may be somewhat unfair to compare the two aspects of his playing. Try to see him in a different light when he plays bass. All a bass player needs to do is hold down the bottom. Personally, I don't want to hear a "lead" bass player. Just play the damn notes and add some tasty harmonies, etc.

The reality is there are only so many musicians to go around a certain area and most don't want to play live anymore, including me. Rehearsals were always fun for me and I would have been happy skipping most gigs.

Be careful what you wish for and don't forget that eventually playing with other musicians will come to an end. If not an end, then a long break in between as you chase a career, have young children, etc. Life WILL get in the way.

Enjoy your current band and provide some inspiration. It might just catch on !

yes, all of us are pretty much in the same boat... we're all middle aged guys ranging in ages from late 30's to late 40's, with wives, kids, full time jobs, etc... we're all on the same page when it comes to our priorities in regards to the band, and where it fits in our lives. we make time for the band as much as we're able to, but there are times when family stuff, work stuff, and illnesses (COVID) gets in the way, and we have to temporarily put the band on hold for a week, two weeks, a month... our main goal with this band is (at our own pace) to play occasional shows maybe once a month or so, and to make some recordings of our songs, and make them available to the public. but here's the thing... I want to be proud of the music/songs we play, and proud of our live performances. I don't want to half-ass it with this band.

and its really not that complicated when it comes to our band line-up situation... the guy who was our drummer is now our second guitarist, and we have a brand new drummer now.

 

[Tatzmann]

 

[paul-e-mann]

yes, all of us are pretty much in the same boat... we're all middle aged guys ranging in ages from late 30's to late 40's, with wives, kids, full time jobs, etc... we're all on the same page when it comes to our priorities in regards to the band, and where it fits in our lives. we make time for the band as much as we're able to, but there are times when family stuff, work stuff, and illnesses (COVID) gets in the way, and we have to temporarily put the band on hold for a week, two weeks, a month... our main goal with this band is (at our own pace) to play occasional shows maybe once a month or so, and to make some recordings of our songs, and make them available to the public. but here's the thing... I want to be proud of the music/songs we play, and proud of our live performances. I don't want to half-ass it with this band.

and its really not that complicated when it comes to our band line-up situation... the guy who was our drummer is now our second guitarist, and we have a brand new drummer now.

You just answered your own problem, "I want to be proud of the music/songs we play, and proud of our live performances. I don't want to half-ass it with this band." You need to say exactly that to your bandmates, tell them they need to step it up or........

I'll let you decide what the "or" is!

 

[10kDA]

I think everybody has found themselves in similar circumstances at various times. In my experience, having varying skill & commitment levels amongst band members, unless they are at extreme swings of the scale, are usually among the smallest speed bumps. If you can make the point that it would be great if these guys would up their game, it's possible they would respond favorably, and just as possible that they may take offense and quit. Either way, problem solved or at least part of it. In my experience the biggest problems are with incompatibility of personalities. I've accepted keeping players with limited skills when they have been making positive contributions to the overall band scenario. But bands can be like capital-R Relationships in terms of personalities and character, where the things that we might perceive as Yellow Alerts are really Red Flags but we tell ourselves "I can deal with this". The stuff we have accepted against our gut feeling and better judgment as "tolerable" are what usually make the whole thing turn to sh!t in the end.

 

[Australian]

Female singers are lovely if you dont show them up on stage.

 

[GibsonMarshallGuy47]

Female singers are lovely if you dont show them up on stage.

 

[Australian]

You’ve probably never had that experience, because I mean the ones born a female, not the other type with the specimen jar on the mantle. 🤪

 

[Frank52387]

As having been in and still in original bands, it’s tough. You may have ideas and a vision, but you need to make sure everyone shares that vision or is on the same page. Everyone wants the same things but thinks there are better ways to get there.

I don’t know if you write the songs and have a more invested interest.


My suggestions would be maybe to get together with just individual band members who are able to invest more time to kick ideas around/jam.
I used to and still will just jam with the drummer to just be creative.

Try to get things together from home where you can record and send it to everyone so they can do their parts on time that works for them.



find new people to play with. Or form a project where you can have more control over the dynamics of the group.

 

[GibsonMarshallGuy47]

You’ve probably never had that experience, because I mean the ones born a female, not the other type with the specimen jar on the mantle. 🤪

I have absolutely no idea what the hell you are even saying, or how your comment pertains to this discussion. are you sure you're in the right conversation thread??

 

[Australian]

I have absolutely no idea what the hell you are even saying, or how your comment pertains to this discussion. are you sure you're in the right conversation thread??

Yeah I’m in the “OP bitchin’ “ thread, correct?

 

[GibsonMarshallGuy47]

Yeah I’m in the “OP bitchin’ “ thread, correct?

 

[coldsteal2]

I hate to say it, but this is pretty Normal in Bands, you are very lucky if you get 4 guys on the same page musicaly and in life.
Good Luck.

 

[dro]

For me, first band was 9pc. + 2 backup singers. From 78 to 81.
Gigged Friday and Saturday's, rehearsed 12-15 hrs per week on top of that.
Too many personalities in the same room.
When the blowup hit, went from 9pc to 4pc with gigs on the books.
The magic number seemed to be 6.
Played with the 6pc for 18 years, before drugs caused the meltdown.
Drummer and I were the youngest, and the last of the original 9.
Did a gig with the drummer last May. Some 44 years later.
Never let a good drummer get away.