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Discussion in 'The Backstage' started by Trumpet Rider, Dec 26, 2016.
I still like this one,
Jeesh I was getting sea sick there!!
I used to read that! And Fat Freddy's Cat!
The nurse asked a patient to remove his clothing and put on a gown to be checked by the doctor.
"In front of you?" he asked shyly.
The nurse said, "Well, I've seen the naked human body before."
The man said, "Not one like mine. You'd die laughing at my naked body."
"Of course I won't laugh," said the nurse to the patient. "I'm a professional. In over twenty years I've never laughed at a patient."
"Okay then," said the patient, and he proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing a huge male body with the smallest adult male organ the nurse had ever seen in her life. In length and girth it was almost identical to a AAA battery. Unable to control herself, the nurse tried to stop a giggle but it just came out. Then she started laughing at the fact that she was laughing. Feeling very badly that she had laughed at the man's private part, she composed herself as well as she could.
"I am so sorry," she said, "I don't know what came over me. On my honor as a nurse and a lady, I promise that it won't happen again. Now, tell me, what seems to be the problem?"
"It's swollen," the patient replied.
She ran out of the room.
Tried to add one but it won't upload. Sorry. It was really funny.
If anybody has a cartoon or funny pic, feel free to post it.
A new guy in town walks into a bar and reads a sign hanging in the entrance, which says "FREE BEER FOR WHOEVER CAN PASS THE TEST!"
So the guy asks the bartender what the test is.
The bartender replies, "Well, first you have to drink that whole gallon of pepper tequila, the whole thing at once, and you can't make a face while doing it. Second, there's a 'gator out back with a sore tooth, you have to remove it with your bare hands. Third, there's a woman upstairs who's never had an orgasm. You gotta make things right for her."
The guy says, "Well, as much as I would love free beer, I won't do it. You have to be nuts to drink a gallon of pepper tequila and then it get crazier from there."
But as time passes and the man drinks a few, he asks, "Wherez zat teqeelah?"
He grabs the gallon of tequila with both hands and downs it with big slurps, tears streaming down his face.
Next, he staggers out back and soon all the people inside hear the most frightening roaring and thumping, then silence.
The man staggers back into the bar, his shirt ripped and big scratches all over his body. "Now," he groans, "where's that woman with the sore tooth?"
David Thorne is a Genius...
This is a classic. Can't believe the announcer never caught on..