how do you go about dealing with....

[dreyn77]

how do you go about dealing with complete strangers in the social part of reality world, out there?

I've had to interact with 5 different groups tonight and I feel like I've done 36 emotional rollacoaster rides.

including comming across a gang committing crimes.

I just finished telling somebody that, to get to my age, a guy has had to go through many fights in life, and they all take their toll on the person.

I was actually stalked by a woman tonight but then at the end of her interview of me, she acted like she wasn't doing it.

my dog got attacked today at the park as well. so that makes 81 times he's been attacked in his 11 years of life.
the silly woman let her dog off the lead, so I put mine on the lead. her dog runs straight at my dog and barks and gowles at my dog, while trying to grab him.
so I said, "well that makes 81 attacks on my dog".
and she says, "that's not an attack, that's being friendly!"

----------
like, where do these twits get off!?
they tell you to your face, that you were born yesturday.

some other idiot woman on a mobile phone conversation, said to the person on the other telephone, "Oh, I've gotta go now, cause I'm driving".

well, she wasn't driving at all! she was having a break from selling stuff in a shop, standing on the sidewalk smoking a cigarette.


during the week, I walked past another shop and the manager of the shop was there, {I've never ever shopped at this shop before} with her back to the shop window, and looking the opposite direction.
I noticed she had what looked like multiple whip lashing marks all over her back in all directions.
I thought to myself, "maybe she's been in a crash and slid across the road"
but the marks weren't all in the same line, so it couldn't have been that as the cause for the marks.
I just suspected the marks were some kinda bondage and displine routine which she partakes in with her spare time, and nothing to do with me. so I keep walkin.

just then she turns around and says "Oh man! he's somebody I do NOT want to see today!"
then turns to look away from the shop window.
one of the other workers makes the comment, "who!?"

so the boss points me out of the crowd and says. "HIM".

I'm just thinking to myself "f OFF! I don't know you, thanks for effing my reputation in town, cow!"
I just continue on my merry way and just think to myself.

-----------
there was another woman (45+ years old) who had said lots of stuff to me all week I knew it couldn't all be true. and she was hot and cold every minute with her attitude.
and basicly did a number on my head, so I've just left the drama with her to deal with and her lots of men friends.
but the only conclusion, I could comeup with, was that she had some form of mental sickness, cause nothing made any sense from what she had said to me. I've no idea what that mental illness was though.
95% of the time, she would act like she was arnold swartznegger, then the next minute she'd act like a kid.
to her, everything in life was like just fun and games. but when you pointed out that life isn't like that, she was a kid and started to sulk.

---------
this was just the tip of the iceburg for me this week. I haven't even mentioned the abusive language from passengers in cars, etc...


Do I need a tshirt which has something printed on it?
how do you deal with these people out there?

I thought I was gonna have a real quiet, easy week. but NO. it's not possible out there.

 

[poeman33]

For most jobs, you have to deal with complete strangers every day. Maybe a familiar face or name, but you don't really know them. I don't see that as any different than dealing with strangers in a non-work environment. I certainly don't have a problem with it in a musical environment.

Sure there is the odd nut out there...but people are basically people. Not much different than you or I. Treat them like regular people, and that will usually work. Try not to overanalyze.

 

[dreyn77]

but they're demanding sometimes.

so you endup getting stuck in situations which are way out of your comfort zones.

I caught the last public transport home the other night and some woman got off the transport and said to me she'd been in town for 4 days and didn't know where she was staying at.

and you say to yourself, "I just do not want to deal with this stuff". but you're in it up to your neck and you must be present in that situation.

came across a gang who were smashing stuff up across the neighbour hood. and once again, you're in it upto your neck again.
must deal with it.

 

[dreyn77]

at work you can put your work ideas into the brain and solve most situations.

I find in the personal world, there's no play book other than laws and morals and observations, etc...
but there's all this other stuff which I'm totally missing, cause I recon I 'get it wrong' or have zero options to do something in the situations.

I don't want to see my only choice being to just stay at home.
and I can totally see that happening with how I can see lots of people are living life out there.

I'm just finding it's too late by the time I've noticed that person has major flaws in their behaviour.
the interaction marks are all over you by that point.

life is much easier if you can see somebody is effected in some way.
normally people give me the dio sign and I know to not go near them, but something must have happend this week.

 

[Mannish Boy]

Sounds like a busy day.

 

[Macro]

The truth?

Know who you really are and never compromise it at any cost. The rest just kinda works itself out.
Easy to say, really hard to do in the real world.

 

[poeman33]

I caught the last public transport home the other night and some woman got off the transport and said to me she'd been in town for 4 days and didn't know where she was staying at. .

Help her if you can, apologize if you can't.

came across a gang who were smashing stuff up across the neighbour hood. and once again, you're in it upto your neck again.
must deal with it.

Call 911, or whatever they call in your world, and back away.


I think you are over analyzing things and making them seem more impossible then they are.

 

[dreyn77]

yeah okay. good points.

yeah I probably do over think stuff. yeah I could go way beyond what I want to do, so I am using some techniques to finish the thinking, it's working out in some ways.

I did wait around with that woman and eventually after 20 minutes she began to remember where she lived. and she got home safely and was very relieved.

to some, the gang problem would be difficult to handle, but for me it's easy to understand what they're doing, so it's not troubling me like the other stuff.

it would be good if we had a playbook which indicated to you that, "now this type of person will act this way or that way",
"and don't listen to these words cause they don't exist, they're just talk, with no meaning".


I was thinking during the week that I should start a thread which has the title, "how many lies should you accept from somebody when you're just getting to know them?"

I recon I wouldn't get past the first conversation with a new potential friend, it would always contain some kinda lie.
then you'd say to yourself, "we'll, how many of these do I let go past me".

 

[Vinsanitizer]

The truth?

Know who you really are and never compromise it at any cost. The rest just kinda works itself out.
Easy to say, really hard to do in the real world.

My second "agree" so far today.

 

[Vinsanitizer]

yeah okay. good points.

yeah I probably do over think stuff. ...

Yeah you do dreyn. There's a saying that goes something like this: "with much wisdom comes much misery...".

It doesn't say knowledge makes you happier, it says it makes you miserable. The ones who think the glass is half full are blissfully ignorant. The ones who think the glass is half empty are the realists. It doesn't make any difference which side you're on, but it looks like the blissfully ignorant will always be happier.

 

[crossroadsnyc]

how do you go about dealing with complete strangers in the social part of reality world, out there?

Sunglasses

 

[blues_n_cues]

you move way out in the country,put up NO TRESPASSING signs,& keep a shotgun by the door.

(it still doesn't stop the Jehovah's Witnesses from knocking on a Saturday morning but that's tomorrow's lesson.)

 

[MarshallDog]

Blow them off, there are as_holes everywhere and you cant let them take control of you in any way.

 

[Söulcaster]

Would you say you feel anxious Dreynn? Distressed? Panicked? Or are these just observations? The lady who ruined your reputation, there must be more history to that?

 

[rick16v]

I quite often avoid people, solidarity is nice once in a while. I go running, or simply ignore my phone, turn off my tablet, and do nothing.

If your daily interactions are regularly stressful or confusing to the point of distress, than that's potentially a problem.

 

[Vinsanitizer]

...I just finished telling somebody that, to get to my age, a guy has had to go through many fights in life, and they all take their toll on the person.

That was as far as I got up to this point. Whenever I read your posts dreyn, I gotta think so hard that it takes a long time. So I have to stop and ponder that right there. See what ahm sayin'?

 

[diesect20022000]

Yeah you do dreyn. There's a saying that goes something like this: "with much wisdom comes much misery...".

It doesn't say knowledge makes you happier, it says it makes you miserable. The ones who think the glass is half full are blissfully ignorant. The ones who think the glass is half empty are the realists. It doesn't make any difference which side you're on, but it looks like the blissfully ignorant will always be happier.

Except the glass is always full as air is a substance but on general principle I agree sort of.. I would think considering both aspects of full and empty to be more realistic as perspective defines ones reallity in many ways . May be over thinking but that's what I do.

 

[SonVolt]

Dryn - how'd you know the lady got home safely and was relieved? Did you swap digits?

 

[dreyn77]

haha, this thread is giving us the laugh we need.

I thought somebody might come to that conclusion there sonvolt.

the answer is NO. I was the true gentleman cause she was super quick early on in saying "Oh I'm lucky I meet somebody really nice".
so when a guy hears that, he's just super nice to the person.

she was worried that I'd get lost in my own neighbourhood.

you want people to be raised to be super 'nice' like that so I walked her to her door as she asked and shook hands and said goodnight.

I've no doubt that she'll see me again sometime. you want that to be a nice time and not the usual nasty reaction from total strangers.

some people in groups of 3 see me and stick their fingers up at me and all I'm doing is shopping or waiting for public transport.

I don't bother with silly people. we don't want the super nice to become the super silly.

great points there VIN. I do forget things like that. I do have the damage inc from over thinking.
I think with dealing with 1 woman this week I was upto 8 lies and she was upto 12 lies just in the first conversation we had.
then she added another 5 lies and I'm like, "hang on! i can see this game getting to 12,000 lies". nobody would need to get to 12,000, so lets end it right here at 17.
as you say, I don't want to think about 17 lies or 12,000.

I thought I was prepared but obviously not. the game has changed, again, and I'm not ready for anything.

I never think of that crossroads. great tip right there! thanks.

rick and soulcaster are on the money too! that works, I've been avoiding the phones etc... yeah it works big time.
until you meet somebody new. then the plan gets abit haywire. (all over the place)

yeah, soulcaster there is, but it's nothing unusual from my/the blokes side of interactions.
but the clock is ticking on her side of life, so it's nearly the point where she'll live lonely with no children. so I guess that's making her do/try new stuff.

I just happen to be 'there' within her range. I now avoid the zones.

I thought S&M was a fad that had past in this town by now. maybe not, now I see the redness.
sometimes you'll see the circle bruising from those HOT CUPs treatment.
but this stuff was shocking to see.

maybe it was a gym accident with a couple of tredmill machines. who knows? lol

If you've been to a vietnamese street party for new year, then you've seen this woman, she standsout from all the crowd, with her level of real beauty. she also has a large group of women who worship her and follow her when she lets them.

large groups of guys seek her out and have had their photo taken with her and they're printed on facebook, with the proud looks on their faces, saying "yeah! we're with HER". attitude.

good luck to them.

like I said before, when I go places people just have their own minor accidents, like their shopping bag breaks right when I walk past and those bottles smash all over the sidewalk. or they trip over and land flat on their face, or they feel the energy and get ajatated and start punching the people they're near.

well, she's no exception.

If you were, like I am, born under the gypsy theory of 'person with a hex on them' then people this sort of stuff people do around you is considered completely normal, but for the person who's dropped their keys into a drain just as they looked at you, it's not normal, it's YOUR fault, they dropped the keys. somehow, in their minds, you made them do it.

I didn't believe that the hexes existed, but I can see that people have no good explaination, for why they don't exist.

I'm really trying to not notice people suffering, but it's hard, as you say.

I know of a woman who exited an office and fell down the stairs. she married the guy who picked her up off the floor.
she thought it was romantic. her work friends thought it was lame.

the gypsy would say he's got a hex on him.
wouldn't you agree?

 

[mickeydg5]

....dealing with aids.

Why just stay away from it.