Guitar is the only thing that keeps me going.

Samano89

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Hello out there,

This Marshall forum has given me great threads and conversations with awesome people. I turn 33 on Thursday (09/29/89) and I have nobody to talk to. I have been through a lot this past year. I’ve been on a Methadone regimen for a couple years and then met someone at the Methadone clinic my age. I was desperate for a friend and he seemed nice enough. Eventually he convinced me to get back on drugs. So I started slipping and became unable to perform at work. So I lost my Warehouse manager job of 7 years. Then he saw all my guitars, amps and music gear and convinced me to pawn it all piece by piece for drugs. Now as I sit in my room I have no guitar, no amp, no pedals, just the rack on the wall that still holds my guitar cables. I have no job, no money and the only thing that kept me going was guitar. Since the age of 13 that has been my one true passion. As I sit here today I’m lonely, confused, embarrassed, no car, no house of my own (moved in with family) and I’m about to be 33 years old. I’ve done nothing with my life and now I’m completely afraid and clueless as to where or how to start again. The thought of one day owning a Marshall amp, nice guitar and pedals will hopefully keep me going. Just hope nobody else out there is in a position like this. Weird the places life takes you.
 

Dogs of Doom

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:welcome:to the forum...

hang in there, you'll get through this & will be able to put it all behind you someday. Luckily, right now, people are looking for employees, at all levels. At least, if you find something temporarily, to bide your time, it'll get you back in the swing of things, to work your way back up the ladder.

best of luck in your endeavors, see you around the forum...

:cheers:
 

Leonard Neemoil

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Hello out there,

This Marshall forum has given me great threads and conversations with awesome people. I turn 33 on Thursday (09/29/89) and I have nobody to talk to. I have been through a lot this past year. I’ve been on a Methadone regimen for a couple years and then met someone at the Methadone clinic my age. I was desperate for a friend and he seemed nice enough. Eventually he convinced me to get back on drugs. So I started slipping and became unable to perform at work. So I lost my Warehouse manager job of 7 years. Then he saw all my guitars, amps and music gear and convinced me to pawn it all piece by piece for drugs. Now as I sit in my room I have no guitar, no amp, no pedals, just the rack on the wall that still holds my guitar cables. I have no job, no money and the only thing that kept me going was guitar. Since the age of 13 that has been my one true passion. As I sit here today I’m lonely, confused, embarrassed, no car, no house of my own (moved in with family) and I’m about to be 33 years old. I’ve done nothing with my life and now I’m completely afraid and clueless as to where or how to start again. The thought of one day owning a Marshall amp, nice guitar and pedals will hopefully keep me going. Just hope nobody else out there is in a position like this. Weird the places life takes you.

This is a tough situation. Not sure if I can help, but feel free to PM me anytime.

Wishing you all the best.
 

Samano89

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Hey thank you Leonard. I’m not quite sure how to PM but any time someone else is willing to talk with me I am more than grateful. Thank you for taking time out of your day to respond. It really means a lot to me. I don’t ever get a chance to talk with anyone.
 

mark123

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Stay strong! Don't hang out with people that just want you for your stuff and definitely don't look for friends in a bar or clinic.

I have a friend that's in a similar situation and every time he starts reminiscing about the past he falls back into his addictions. Get that stuff out of your head. Fill your time and thoughts with something else, work or projects or reading. Active things, not binge watching Netflix.

PM sent.
 

Kutt

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Take one thing at a time. Do your best to not think too far down the road as it can overwhelm you, just like it can overwhelm any one of us regardless of where our life is. Each day that you wake up ask yourself "what matters today?". Be honest with yourself and stick to the positive answers no matter what.

Aim for the small wins to begin with and after a while you will find yourself stringing together some bigger wins.

Don't ever give up. It's OK to ask for help.
 
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kinleyd

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Hey buddy, welcome to the MF.

So sorry to hear your troubles. I don't know what else to say except that it's OK even if you are down and out at 33. It happens to a lot of people, so don't be hard on yourself.

The important thing to remember is you still have family and friends, and that you are only 33! You are still young, and still have several lifetimes ahead of you!

Try to see your life as actually made up of several lifetimes: loosely your youth (birth to 20-30), your mid years (20-30 to 40-50) and so on. Each stretch is so different from the other!

So even if you feel the first lifetime was a washout, the next two or three don't have to be. So as others have said, embrace your time and your life, and get back on guitar as well. Having 2/3 of your life to enjoy is a huge deal - take it!

All the best my friend!
 

Samano89

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So sorry to hear brother. Getting off drugs must be one of the hardest thongs to do. Dont let the past define you though. Be strong and with small steps you can get back to a job and playing again.
Thank you. It’s very rough. The one thing that kept me going and had my attention on something positive was my guitar playing. Once that went away I had nothing to do but sit with my thoughts and eventually find myself back to my old habits. You know what it feels like, like coming back to the world after a 15 year prison sentence and having to start all over and adjust to a world you now feel a stranger too. That’s the closest comparison that I can think of.
 

Samano89

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Stay strong! Don't hang out with people that just want you for your stuff and definitely don't look for friends in a bar or clinic.

I have a friend that's in a similar situation and every time he starts reminiscing about the past he falls back into his addictions. Get that stuff out of your head. Fill your time and thoughts with something else, work or projects or reading. Active things, not binge watching Netflix.

PM sent.
Thank you Mark I really appreciate the advice. It truly means a lot!
 

Samano89

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Take one thing at a time. Do your best to not think too far down the road as it cant overwhelm you, just like it can overwhelm any one of us regardless of where our life is. Each day that you wake up ask yourself "what matters today?". Be honest with yourself and stick to the positive answers no matter what.

Aim for the small wins to begin with and after a while you will find yourself stringing together some bigger wins.

Don't ever give up. It's OK to ask for help.
Thank you Kutt, I really appreciate your kind words! Take care!
 

Samano89

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Hey buddy, welcome to the MF.

So sorry to hear your troubles. I don't know what else to say except that it's OK even if you are down and out at 33. It happens to a lot of people, so don't be hard on yourself.

The important thing to remember is you still have family and friends, and that you are only 33! You are still young, and still have several lifetimes ahead of you!

Try to see your life as actually made up of several lifetimes: loosely your youth (birth to 20-30), your mid years (20-30 to 40-50) and so on. Each stretch is so different from the other!

So even if you feel the first lifetime was a washout, the next two or three don't have to be. So as others have said, embrace your time and your life, and get back on guitar as well. Having 2/3 of your life to enjoy is a huge deal - take it!

All the best my friend!
Hey man thank you so much! I am extremely grateful for any advice I can get. It’s hard to motivate myself each day, hearing from someone else is very important to me.
 

Samano89

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Hang in there, and I hope you kicked that "friend" to the curb.
Thanks man! He still tries to contact me and I try to ignore him, what’s hard is that he’s the only friend I have so it’s be alone or hang out with a guy who uses me.
 

Samano89

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This is a tough situation. Not sure if I can help, but feel free to PM me anytime.

Wishing you all the best.
Hey Leonard,

Not sure why but I can’t PM or start a conversation with anyone. When I click on a persons profile it doesn’t show the “start a conversation” option for some reason. Not sure if it’s my account or my phone.
 

paul-e-mann

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Hello out there,

This Marshall forum has given me great threads and conversations with awesome people. I turn 33 on Thursday (09/29/89) and I have nobody to talk to. I have been through a lot this past year. I’ve been on a Methadone regimen for a couple years and then met someone at the Methadone clinic my age. I was desperate for a friend and he seemed nice enough. Eventually he convinced me to get back on drugs. So I started slipping and became unable to perform at work. So I lost my Warehouse manager job of 7 years. Then he saw all my guitars, amps and music gear and convinced me to pawn it all piece by piece for drugs. Now as I sit in my room I have no guitar, no amp, no pedals, just the rack on the wall that still holds my guitar cables. I have no job, no money and the only thing that kept me going was guitar. Since the age of 13 that has been my one true passion. As I sit here today I’m lonely, confused, embarrassed, no car, no house of my own (moved in with family) and I’m about to be 33 years old. I’ve done nothing with my life and now I’m completely afraid and clueless as to where or how to start again. The thought of one day owning a Marshall amp, nice guitar and pedals will hopefully keep me going. Just hope nobody else out there is in a position like this. Weird the places life takes you.
Dont be a fukking loser! Dont hang out with losers and partake in fukking loser activities! The fact youre reaching out tells me youre not a loser, you want better for yourself. There's no free lunch in this world, only you can carve out an existence for yourself, I know you know that so just get out there and do it! You need a friend there's lots of them right here, everybody is welcome here so hang out and have a good time! :yesway:

I look forward to hearing good things from you very soon my brother, and welcome! :yesway:
 

Samano89

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Dont be a fukking loser! Dont hang out with losers and partake in fukking loser activities! The fact youre reaching out tells me youre not a loser, you want better for yourself. There's no free lunch in this world, only you can carve out an existence for yourself, I know you know that so just get out there and do it! You need a friend there's lots of them right here, everybody is welcome here so hang out and have a good time! :yesway:

I look forward to hearing good things from you very soon my brother, and welcome! :yesway:
Hey thank you man! I really appreciate your reply. I was getting worried at first when I started reading it I thought you were going off on me calling me a fucking loser and I started getting panicky lol. But yes you are right. I am so ready to take my next steps into a better life. I just have no self-confidence and no job skills so I have no idea how/where to start. I’ve been on pain pills since I was 18. So I completely lost my entire 20’s. It’s like my brain didn’t develop that whole time so now I am a 32 year old with the brain of a fucking 18 year old. It’s pathetic. I’m pathetic.
 

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