How to get GIRLS?

carnada · 09-13-2009, 03:13 PM

guys, marystrat lol. PLEASE teach how to get girls. probably the harderst thing even in existance on earht????

woodddj · 09-13-2009, 03:40 PM

the funny thing about this is. you spend half your life trying to find a woman, and once you find one. you spend the other half trying to get rid of her.

American Viking · 09-13-2009, 03:50 PM

words. it's all about how you talk to them. I'm bearded with a beer gut and covered in tats but I can still pull 'em out the bar. I ain't no looker but I got charm.

oh yeah, booze helps a lot too.

...or... a rag, chloroform, and borrow the band van.

Gtrman58 · 09-13-2009, 04:16 PM

Show them some attention from stage. Rock their world like they are the only one in the place. Be a decent muscian...tell them how hot they are and once you have their attention, tell them what you would like to do to them when you have them alone...really... DON'T HOLD BACK !!!! Once u score...treat them like shit. Babes love bad boys.

This formula has worked for every rocker I have ever known...
Follow it and shes yours forever!!!!

MartyStrat54 · 09-13-2009, 04:24 PM

I'll have to think about this for a while. Although a rag, with chloroform on it will work almost 100 per cent of the time.

There were nine kids in our family. Five of them were girls. They had girlfriends. I learned a lot about girls this way. The main thing is to be a confident talker. You don't have to be book smart, but talk about a variety of subjects until the girl takes to one. Now you have broken the ice. You now need to elaborate on the subject and talk comfortably. Don't dart your eyes all around. Look her in the eyes when you are talking to her. That is the hardest thing for a young guy to do, but once you master that, you will be the king.

Also, the modern thing nowadays is to always be prepared. Keep a condom handy and learn to put it on with one hand (master level

). Your other hand may be busy doing other things. Believe it or not, sometimes a girl just gets plumb horny and will attack you. Don't fear this...appreciate it for what it is, an easy lay.

Throughout my life I became a master of the two week relationship. These are loads of fun, but then you have to break the news to her and move on. Sometimes they will retaliate, so you have to watch yourself.

I like being single, cuz no one tells me what I have to do. I think I got spoiled by being this way. When I did try marriage, both of them did me very wrong and I dumped both of them without a penny and sent them on their way. Right now I hang with the hot looking 35 to 40 year old's. Most of them have been married twice and all they are looking for is some fun. Of course, I'm more than willing.

I hope things work out for you. Remember, confidence and look 'em in the eyes.

carnada · 09-13-2009, 05:34 PM

im good at looking girls in the eyes, but unfortunately some of them have iron maiden shirts and its very hard to concentrate!!!

Allterr · 09-13-2009, 05:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MartyStrat54

Throughout my life I became a master of the two week relationship. These are loads of fun, but then you have to break the news to her and move on. Sometimes they will retaliate, so you have to watch yourself.

+1!!!

carnada · 09-13-2009, 07:23 PM

but like how do you approach a girl at school, and then ask her out? and when you ask someone out, how do you do it???

BTW im only 17 so I cant go to pubs YET

MajorNut1967 · 09-13-2009, 07:40 PM

Hee Hee! I've fallen and I can't get get up! This site has the best Humor I've seen and 9-10 times it's Marty's fault or he caused it. LOL

:laugh2 :

javier pintos · 09-13-2009, 07:49 PM

welllllll just don´t us cloroform at the school, some dude tryed it once withou knowin what he was doing and both he and the girl ended up asleep, what a fucking laugh we al had we they were found

MartyStrat54 · 09-13-2009, 07:51 PM

YESSIR!!! Blame it all on me.

carnada · 09-13-2009, 08:22 PM

what the fuck is chroloform? or choloform or whatever? xD

woodddj · 09-13-2009, 08:31 PM

its a chemical use to put someone or something to sleep. if you breath it, you are out like a lite.

American Viking · 09-13-2009, 10:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by carnada

but like how do you approach a girl at school, and then ask her out? and when you ask someone out, how do you do it???

BTW im only 17 so I cant go to pubs YET

Just talk to them, don't fear rejection. Chicks dig confidence, and you can use the ugly ones as practice for the pretty ones. They all need some lovin'.

twistudriffer · 09-13-2009, 10:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by American Viking

Just talk to them, don't fear rejection. Chicks dig confidence, and you can use the ugly ones as practice for the pretty ones. They all need some lovin'.

+1. AV and his infinite words of wisdom

American Viking · 09-13-2009, 10:43 PM

Why do fat girls give good head?

Because they have to.

Jesstaa · 09-14-2009, 12:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by carnada

im good at looking girls in the eyes, but unfortunately some of them have iron maiden shirts and its very hard to concentrate!!!

Oh you lucky fucker.
My problem is exactly the opposite, none of them wear Iron Maiden shirts (well, other than my mum, but I'm not going there). So I get bored of them quite easily.

And Martys advice is key, BE PREPARED man, you never know when one will just spring up on you. Trust me =P. Although dude, DON'T MAKE MY MISTAKE, if they have a boyfriend, DON'T GO THERE. I got lucky, but the same might not happen for you xD

If you've got Iron Maiden chicks, I'm there, lemme work my magic =)

Quote:

Originally Posted by carnada

but like how do you approach a girl at school, and then ask her out? and when you ask someone out, how do you do it???

BTW im only 17 so I cant go to pubs YET

Man, 17? And Maiden chicks? DUDE, what are you doing.
Walk up to them, tell them how much you love Maiden, show them some riffs, make up some stories of smoking pot with Bruce and the boys back stage, and they're yours. Seriously, confidence with these girls.

MartyStrat54 · 09-14-2009, 02:00 PM

When you have a group of girls, you can use the following.

"Yeah times are pretty tough right now, but I'll start getting money from my trust fund when I turn 18." Talk about perking up the conversation! You'll get some action for sure. When you turn 18, tell them that it got changed to 21. By that time, you will be established as a chick magnet.

Remember, chicks love money...even money that you don't have yet. (Or never will have.) All you got to do is come up with a fantasy story involving money that you may get.

"My uncle's sick and I was his favorite. He has 18 million in various banks. I am going to be in his will." Knock, knock. "Who's there?" Chicks... a whole bunch of them.

carnada · 09-14-2009, 04:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jesstaa

Oh you lucky fucker.
My problem is exactly the opposite, none of them wear Iron Maiden shirts (well, other than my mum, but I'm not going there). So I get bored of them quite easily.

And Martys advice is key, BE PREPARED man, you never know when one will just spring up on you. Trust me =P. Although dude, DON'T MAKE MY MISTAKE, if they have a boyfriend, DON'T GO THERE. I got lucky, but the same might not happen for you xD

If you've got Iron Maiden chicks, I'm there, lemme work my magic =)

Man, 17? And Maiden chicks? DUDE, what are you doing.
Walk up to them, tell them how much you love Maiden, show them some riffs, make up some stories of smoking pot with Bruce and the boys back stage, and they're yours. Seriously, confidence with these girls.

oh man I went to this metal show of a band I really liked and....turns out the drummer was a fucking chick man, she was a good drummer, I told her all my TRUE iron maiden stories that I sent a letter to bruce dickinson and he read it live in his radio show, and then that I called a radio station where nicko mcbrain was gonna be interviewed and then I got to talk with nicko like big ol friends

fucking good times, and then I told her that I was in a maidne tribute band, and then she was like "WOW THATS AWESOME, DOES THE SINGER WAILL?????" and I was like "oh I LOVE those waynes world words lol". I was talking with her and shit, and she was fucking 19, I was fucking 16 at the time, but she looked my age, damn I could have lied about my age. Then turns out the bassist of the band was her boyfriend

I even so him touching her tits on top of her shirt after a few hours at the bar....really broke my heart dude..........

Anyways, theres this girl in fucking math class that is fucking driving me nuttsssss she used to sit beside me and on chair up, but now she sits RIGHT behind me. And seriously sometimes I have to turn around to look at her awesome legs and ass, and TITS. I even asked her if she could explain me one thing i didnt understand just to talk to her. BUT its the second time I take that course because I got a 50 out of a 100 the last time, its sstill a pass, but I want a better mark. SO I obviously knew the answer better than she did, because its the second time I take the course. BUT yeah, I got to talk to her and such, but now I dont know what to say to make her say SOMETHING!!!!! I should ask her something about math....hmmm........ ANY TIPPPSSSSS????

theres another girl in my business class, Im kinda the joker in my class, cuz I always tell good jokes, but some girls dont seem to really like good jokes lol. So this girl is really hot, but I dont think she really likes me because im not as like fashion guy, and wearing american eagle shirts every day to school with square design pants....

THERES another girl I like in my english class, shes taallll and shes got like the nicest fucking legs ever, just amaziiiinnnnnnnnggggggggggggggg. MORE TIPS LOL!

carnada · 09-14-2009, 07:19 PM

anyone?

Jesstaa · 09-14-2009, 07:49 PM

Lucky punk.

There's only 1 chick I know that likes Maiden in like half of my classes, good friends with her, but I annoy her too much for anything more =(

Also she has a boyfriend.

And she's not really into my whole uber metal look. =(

Lol

Allterr · 09-14-2009, 07:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MartyStrat54

When you have a group of girls, you can use the following.

"Yeah times are pretty tough right now, but I'll start getting money from my trust fund when I turn 18." Talk about perking up the conversation! You'll get some action for sure. When you turn 18, tell them that it got changed to 21. By that time, you will be established as a chick magnet.

Remember, chicks love money...even money that you don't have yet. (Or never will have.) All you got to do is come up with a fantasy story involving money that you may get.

"My uncle's sick and I was his favorite. He has 18 million in various banks. I am going to be in his will." Knock, knock. "Who's there?" Chicks... a whole bunch of them.

Hahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!

superimposedmedia · 09-14-2009, 08:15 PM

Very sound advice Dr. Marty!

carnada · 09-14-2009, 08:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jesstaa

Lucky punk.

There's only 1 chick I know that likes Maiden in like half of my classes, good friends with her, but I annoy her too much for anything more =(

Also she has a boyfriend.

And she's not really into my whole uber metal look. =(

Lol

I kno eh??? girls cant dig the awesome metal look with jeans and a black t shirt and long hair falling of your shoulder hmmm. I wonder whats wrong with that. Maybe we look to deathy and scary????

I dont know any other girl that likes maiden except from that one I met at the show.

carnada · 09-14-2009, 08:19 PM

and BTW marty

I have been working, and I already have like 1700 in da bank

I should show it off to some girls and shit, Im still always with cash in my wallet cuz I get tips where I work, I get around 30 bucks every 2 weeks, thats enough to buy shit for girls ya know

I could be a ladies man only if girls liked me lol. BUT the bank money is going to my amps

MartyStrat54 · 09-14-2009, 09:10 PM

Well, just remember that all the girls you meet now are not going to alter your life. It's when you get older and the girl thinks the two of you should get serious and she thinks the Marshall cabs are taking up to much floor space in your apartment and your friends are a little skanky for you to be seeing anymore. You know what I mean? It's called love...commitment. It's sort of like pushing a screwdriver in your eye. That's why I like short relationships. When you break up, the chick doesn't have a lot of ammo to use on you. It's like, "Get out."

So don't despair, because you see what you have to look forward to? Take advantage of your youth while you have the time. If you can't find your ideal Iron Maiden girlfriend, then maybe you should think Duran, Duran (or AC/DC).

Allterr · 09-14-2009, 09:14 PM

Marty.......you are the best, my friend.......

Jesstaa · 09-14-2009, 11:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MartyStrat54

Well, just remember that all the girls you meet now are not going to alter your life. It's when you get older and the girl thinks the two of you should get serious and she thinks the Marshall cabs are taking up to much floor space in your apartment and your friends are a little skanky for you to be seeing anymore. You know what I mean? It's called love...commitment. It's sort of like pushing a screwdriver in your eye. That's why I like short relationships. When you break up, the chick doesn't have a lot of ammo to use on you. It's like, "Get out."

So don't despair, because you see what you have to look forward to? Take advantage of your youth while you have the time. If you can't find your ideal Iron Maiden girlfriend, then maybe you should think Duran, Duran (or AC/DC).

Oh yeah, that's another thing.

Flying V's and Fullstacks, combos suck, full stacks get you laid (That's my motto at least)

American Viking · 09-15-2009, 04:29 AM

lol, if there's a chick in the band you can count on one thing, that she's hooked up with one of the male members. That's a given in any case. If they're not with her, than they're trying...

Ask yourself what would any of you would do if you were on the road with a chick. Us guys share some pretty intimate stuff when we're side by side for weeks at a time, what do you think happens when one of your band mates has tits and a vagina?
That's how scientists get caged animals to bang. They just put them in the same cage.

Frankie · 09-15-2009, 10:20 AM

Hardest thing in existence? Shit, it's harder for me to find a properly mixed gin and tonic than it is to pick up chicks.

09-13-2009, 03:13 PM	#1 (permalink)
carnada Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: 22 Acacia Avenue Posts: 1,194	How to get GIRLS? guys, marystrat lol. PLEASE teach how to get girls. probably the harderst thing even in existance on earht????

09-13-2009, 03:40 PM	#2 (permalink)
woodddj Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: alabama Posts: 408	Re: How to get GIRLS? the funny thing about this is. you spend half your life trying to find a woman, and once you find one. you spend the other half trying to get rid of her.

09-13-2009, 03:50 PM	#3 (permalink)
American Viking Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: RICHMOND, VIRGINIA Posts: 2,031	Re: How to get GIRLS? words. it's all about how you talk to them. I'm bearded with a beer gut and covered in tats but I can still pull 'em out the bar. I ain't no looker but I got charm. oh yeah, booze helps a lot too. ...or... a rag, chloroform, and borrow the band van. __________________ Transformers inside amplifiers were not originally designed to be in there, and the tube was not created for the guitar amp. ANY recommended idle current is a guideline and in no way a necessary requirement. There is no skeleton key for any tube amp.

09-13-2009, 04:16 PM	#4 (permalink)
Gtrman58 Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: St. Louis, Mo. Posts: 191	Re: How to get GIRLS? Show them some attention from stage. Rock their world like they are the only one in the place. Be a decent muscian...tell them how hot they are and once you have their attention, tell them what you would like to do to them when you have them alone...really... DON'T HOLD BACK !!!! Once u score...treat them like shit. Babes love bad boys. This formula has worked for every rocker I have ever known... Follow it and shes yours forever!!!! __________________ 2009 JCM 2000 Dsl 100 JCM 900 LEAD 1960A MLB MC412A 1951 Fender Deluxe 2006 Hot Rod Deluxe 1995 Blues Junior 1995 Blues Deville Vox Path Finder 1982 Legend A 30 1980 Gibson Herritage Cherry Sunburst L.P. Standard 1980 Explorer White with gold HW 2000 52 Telecaster USA RI 1983 57 Strat LH USA RI 2003 57 Strat USA RI 1960 Silvertone Danelectro 1994 Fender P-bass 68 RI Acoustic guitars....not enough space to list !!!!!

09-13-2009, 05:34 PM	#6 (permalink)
carnada Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: 22 Acacia Avenue Posts: 1,194	Re: How to get GIRLS? im good at looking girls in the eyes, but unfortunately some of them have iron maiden shirts and its very hard to concentrate!!!

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09-13-2009, 07:23 PM	#8 (permalink)
carnada Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: 22 Acacia Avenue Posts: 1,194	Re: How to get GIRLS? but like how do you approach a girl at school, and then ask her out? and when you ask someone out, how do you do it??? BTW im only 17 so I cant go to pubs YET

09-13-2009, 07:40 PM	#9 (permalink)
MajorNut1967 Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: South Pacific Posts: 1,040	Re: How to get GIRLS? Hee Hee! I've fallen and I can't get get up! This site has the best Humor I've seen and 9-10 times it's Marty's fault or he caused it. LOL:laugh2 : __________________ MJN1967 aka BA (Bad Attitude) 1958 Fender 5E3 Deluxe 1968 model 1987 50watt. A Baby Major (Half-Power) I built from the ground up. JTM 45 Clone combo Ground up build. JCM 800 Clone Ground up build, with Wilder Mods. Custom Built Warmoth Strat 75' Fender Tele-Deluxe '70 style strat custom build w/Custom Shop 69's PU's

09-13-2009, 07:49 PM	#10 (permalink)
javier pintos Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Mexico Posts: 357	Re: How to get GIRLS? welllllll just don´t us cloroform at the school, some dude tryed it once withou knowin what he was doing and both he and the girl ended up asleep, what a fucking laugh we al had we they were found

09-13-2009, 08:22 PM	#12 (permalink)
carnada Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: 22 Acacia Avenue Posts: 1,194	Re: How to get GIRLS? what the fuck is chroloform? or choloform or whatever? xD

09-13-2009, 08:31 PM	#13 (permalink)
woodddj Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: alabama Posts: 408	Re: How to get GIRLS? its a chemical use to put someone or something to sleep. if you breath it, you are out like a lite.

09-13-2009, 10:43 PM	#16 (permalink)
American Viking Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: RICHMOND, VIRGINIA Posts: 2,031	Re: How to get GIRLS? Why do fat girls give good head? Because they have to. __________________ Transformers inside amplifiers were not originally designed to be in there, and the tube was not created for the guitar amp. ANY recommended idle current is a guideline and in no way a necessary requirement. There is no skeleton key for any tube amp.

09-14-2009, 07:19 PM	#20 (permalink)
carnada Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: 22 Acacia Avenue Posts: 1,194	Re: How to get GIRLS? anyone?

09-14-2009, 07:49 PM	#21 (permalink)
Jesstaa Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Gippsland, Vic, Australia. Posts: 1,060	Re: How to get GIRLS? Lucky punk. There's only 1 chick I know that likes Maiden in like half of my classes, good friends with her, but I annoy her too much for anything more =( Also she has a boyfriend. And she's not really into my whole uber metal look. =( Lol __________________ GEAR LIST Marshall JCM900 4100 (6L6) (1995) Marshall Valvestate 1965A cab (????) Cort VX-2V (2008) H&S 7 String (Years are over rated) TUBES/SPEAKERS Power: Groove Tube 6L6GCB Phase Inverter: Chinese 12AX7A Pre: V1 - N.O.S Mullard ECC83. V2 Chinese 12AX7A Speakers: Celestion G10L-35 Marshall forever My tube amp & Real Music appreciation forum

09-14-2009, 08:15 PM	#23 (permalink)
superimposedmedia Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Louisiana Posts: 123	Re: How to get GIRLS? Very sound advice Dr. Marty! __________________ Listen to Bee Sting - myspace.com/superimposedmedia

09-14-2009, 08:19 PM	#25 (permalink)
carnada Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: 22 Acacia Avenue Posts: 1,194	Re: How to get GIRLS? and BTW marty I have been working, and I already have like 1700 in da bank I should show it off to some girls and shit, Im still always with cash in my wallet cuz I get tips where I work, I get around 30 bucks every 2 weeks, thats enough to buy shit for girls ya know I could be a ladies man only if girls liked me lol. BUT the bank money is going to my amps

09-14-2009, 09:14 PM	#27 (permalink)
Allterr Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Apopka, FL Posts: 76	Re: How to get GIRLS? Marty.......you are the best, my friend....... __________________ Amps 95 Valvestate 8100 100V 05 MG15CDR 09 JCM2000 DSL 100 Guitars 92 Jackson Stealth Pro 90 Washburn Mercury 88 Steinburger headless

09-15-2009, 04:29 AM	#29 (permalink)
American Viking Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: RICHMOND, VIRGINIA Posts: 2,031	Re: How to get GIRLS? lol, if there's a chick in the band you can count on one thing, that she's hooked up with one of the male members. That's a given in any case. If they're not with her, than they're trying... Ask yourself what would any of you would do if you were on the road with a chick. Us guys share some pretty intimate stuff when we're side by side for weeks at a time, what do you think happens when one of your band mates has tits and a vagina? That's how scientists get caged animals to bang. They just put them in the same cage. __________________ Transformers inside amplifiers were not originally designed to be in there, and the tube was not created for the guitar amp. ANY recommended idle current is a guideline and in no way a necessary requirement. There is no skeleton key for any tube amp.

09-15-2009, 10:20 AM	#30 (permalink)
Frankie Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Clearwater, FL Posts: 365	Re: How to get GIRLS? Hardest thing in existence? Shit, it's harder for me to find a properly mixed gin and tonic than it is to pick up chicks. __________________ w w w . c o w b o y m a f i a . n e t Myspace.com \| YouTube \| Facebook

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